Sorry Queen Bey, hate to break it to ya, you did NOT, “wake up like this”.

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Sorry Queen Bey, hate to break it to ya, you did NOT, “wake up like this”.

Behind the chair I hear oh so often, “I wish I could do my hair as good as you do“, or, “I wish I could get my curls to look as good as when you do them“. GIRL, I did NOT wake up one day and know how to do any of this, nor do I ever act like I did!  Anything you see me excel at I will 100% admit that I did NOT just wake up and know how to do. I am no prodigy. I am however a hard worker and will put my mind to getting better at things I wish to achieve.

Have a goal you’re working towards? I have four words for you, “Get used to sucking”. YOU WILL SUCK AT FIRST. On the insane off chance that you’re not half bad at whatever it is you’re working on perfecting, YAY, but know you are an exception to the rule. You have to fail so many times before you finally get it right. You have to fail before you finally find what works for you.

Let’s take hair styling for example.

Curling your hair (UGH! I SUCK AT IT) .. you were all thinking it I just said it .

My first few dozen times curling my own hair I looked like a darn stunt double to Shirley Temple. It was frustrating, but I kept at it! I would practice on friends and family, I’d practice on myself, literally if my dog had long enough hair I probably would’ve practiced on her too. Then finally, styling got easier. I started looking presentable. I started to figure out what worked better for the look I was trying to achieve. Then the fun started to happen. Once I nailed down the technique that took me 1,483 times to figure out how to do , I got to have FUN with it. I started to push it a little further! What happens if  I use a flat iron THIS WAY instead of the way I already know how? What if I take bigger sections? What if I leave the ends out? I wonder if I can crimp this way for more textured finishes… OH THE POSSIBILITIES!  But guess what, I DID NOT WAKE UP KNOWING ALL OF THESE THINGS. It took a lot of trial and error before I got comfortable enough with my skill set to then start experimenting beyond that. Does this mean everything you put your mind to is going to take you 1,000 times to do before you get good at it, no. What I’m trying to say is, remove the word, “perfection” out of your vocabulary or at least throw it to the way back of the line.

Once you accept the SUCK you’ll be amazed at how resilient you are in certain situations. Flipping your mentality and understanding this is all part of the journey to get to your goal will make the entire experience to your “perfection” so much more enjoyable.

And when you’re feeling defeated, just remember me looking like Shirley Temple.

XO